Let’s face it, buying or selling a home can be one of the must stressful things that anyone ever goes through in their life. I see this stress every day, and it doesn’t matter what stage of the process they are in.
The seller stresses about whether their house will sell in time for them to have the money to buy the new home. They stress about the inspections. They stress about getting the new mortgage. They stress about whether or not 
the people buying their house will be able to get a mortgage. They stress about moving. I am sure that I have missed a few stresses.
The buyer stresses about a lot of the same things as the seller, except in many cases this is the first time that they are going through this. So they stress because they have no idea about what lies ahead. They stress about the new payments. They stress about where to get their insurance for the first time. They stress about whether or not they will have enough money. They stress about qualifying for a loan. They stress about stress, and if you haven’t gotten the picture yet, they stress.
That is why it is so important for us to try to take away some of that stress, by holding their hand through every step of this journey. We have to constantly reassure them. Answer all their question, no matter how silly they might be, because to them it isn’t silly. We even need to be very careful in how we talk to them. Some times I feel like this is a full time job in its self. That is why I make myself available 24/7, well maybe 24/6 ½ , Sunday morning is the exception. I even attend my closings, not because I serve any useful purpose there except for maybe acting as a security blanket.
This business is a people business and sometimes we have to be more involved then we want to be with our clients, but to me it comes with the territory. I always try to put myself in their shoes. I try to treat them the way I would want to be treated.
But I am preaching to the choir. Realtors see the same thing on their end, and that is why it is a team effort. I keep the Realtors I work with informed of everything that is taking place on my end of things, and in turn they keep me informed. I have found that this not only makes the transaction go by quicker, but also less stressful for everybody involved.
McCue Mortgage is a Connecticut based Mortgage Co., that specializes in first time homebuyers. However, we are equipped to service all homebuyer with many loan programs.
ActiveRain Corp. is not responsible for the accuracy of the site's content (which is written by members of the ActiveRain Real Estate Network) and does not endorse the views of the real estate agents, mortgage brokers, and others listed here.
Powered by the ActiveRain Real Estate Network
© 2009 ActiveRain Corp. All Rights Reserved
Does it really have to be that stressful if the agent has systems and processes in place to make it a smooth transaction?
Systems and processes help to keep things on task and running smoothly, but there is always the element of the unknown, and aspects of the transaction that are out of everyone's control - inspections, appraisals, underwriters, the other agent's ego, etc.
George, you're right on the nail here. Answer the endless questions, constantly reassure, educate them about what lies ahead, and stay ever positive. Congrats on the Gold Star!
"Who ya gonna call? StressBusters!"
First off, George, great topic....
2nd...Tony... I agree that there are systems in place to make it smooth....but we are humans and people just stress and or get nervous. No matter how much you hold their hand, reassure them, etc etc. It's just second nature at times.
And like Rich and George both said.... educating anyone involved definately helps... and reassuring them that things will turn out just fine.
Even with great agent processes in place, it can be very stressful. We do everything we can to reduce that, but there are lots of things we can not prevent. We have to do our best to keep things calm and provide perspective. Having a mortgage broker who provides the same kind of professional support is invaluable.
It's good to see a Mortgage Broker who try's to do what he can to alleviate stress. We are all, as Realtor's and Mort. Brokers being paid to do this. People come to us to handle those things for them, otherwise they might as well do it themselves.
Good point, George
"Mortgage George"....
Another touch down. I hope you are doing a little football dance on this post.
We must hold their hands until our palms are sweaty and sometimes give them a blanket to keep them feeling all warm and fuzzy.
Good job on this post. EXCELLENT!
You know what else...I will behave...How shocking is that?
TLW "The Lovely Wife"...Kum La Ka Lakka...ROAR!
Our core values are the same in the Settlement business. As a Title company, we proactivly keep the realtors and mortgage broker up to status.
This allows a trickle down to the actual buyers/sellers.
I sit in on closings once in awhile just to gauge our company's commitment to excellence. Thus far, we are maintaining our philosophy.
The buyers and sellers will always be a bit stressed...it's the team around them that SHOULD work in unison to minimize that stress.
Good question Tony, and the answers that followed by Rich, Jeff, Karen, TLW, and Rob, were great answers and examples of what we have to do.
TLW, it would be shocking if you behaved, but we both know you won't, and I don't think anyyyyyyy body wants you to.
George~ Very well written. I also agree that systems and proceedures can make it less stressful- but the stress IS always there, especially with the variables that you cannot control (read: People's Egos).
I guess that the one thing that doesn't set right with me, is being available 24/7. I feel that we can successfully and supportively run our business and meet (and exceed) our clients' needs and expectations, without being available 24/7. No other "professional" maintains constant 24/7 availability. Of course there are those lovely exceptions- but for everytime our business cuts into family (or self) time, it gets made up later.
(p.s. It snowed so much here last night that my son has a 2-hour delay! Already!!)
I agree Derek & Mariana about the 24/7 thing, but that is just me. I don't really look at my job as a job, and the way that I am able to do it, it has just become a part of everything else. So getting a phone call at 10:00 at night from a Realtor, who has to have a Pre-Qualification letter first thing in the morning, isn't a big deal. It wasn't always this way. When my kids were growing up, the job couldn't be 24/7, they came before the job and that meant time away from the job. But now it is just my wife and I, and 24/7 is no big deal. After 32 years we have learned to balance things in our lives and make them work.
Take some time to enjoy that snow with your son, those day are great memories for me.
It sounds corny, but one thing I do that alleviates a little stress is giving the buyer a medicine bottle filled with m&ms at contract signing for 'buyer's remorse' and remind them that they should take it at 2am when they wake up in a cold sweat thinking they paid too much (which is precisely the time when the seller wakes up in a cold sweat thinking they took too little). On that last couple of comments-I have quit answering my phone at all hours of the day and night. I keep preaching that I want to be treated like a professional and I'm not sure exactly the last time an attorney answered the phone past 6p at the latest.
Leigh, I love the m&m thing, I might start using that.
I think if we go into the transaction "projecting" it's going to be stressful, we increase the chances that it will in fact be stressful. There is good stress and bad stress - I prefer to focus on the positive.
Good post. Stress levels are different for all individuals. Some can endure all life changes without much stress. Others the smallest challenge can stress them out to the max. As real estate agents we know our clients and how to communicate with them according to their stress levels. All successful agents do have good systems in place to make the transaction go smoothly but when it comes to financial situations some of our clients stress levels can overwhelm them.
"Mortgage George"
Good. Why? I like knowing people just smiled in the middle of being serious. Kind of break up the day a little with a smile. Life is just so serious for all of us!
Smiles, Joy and Humor make for a healthy balanced mind. Not that I have one of those...but I can keep trying. LOL. See :>
Damn, sounds like I am loosing that whole point thing again!
So much for behaving...I give up...I just can't do it. It's boring. See :<
TLW "The Lovely Wife"...Kum La Ka Lakka...ROAR!
Your right Karen, when it comes to money they stress out real quick, and you have to calm them down right away.
I focus on the positive with all my Borrowers Suzanne, that is one of the best ways to keep their stress down. But I have been doing this long enough that no matter how smooth the transaction is, it is stressful to them. It is the most money they have probably spent in their lives, and their monthly financial commitment is probably about to go higher than it has ever been before. It can't help but to be stressful and I haven't done a closing yet where this was not a concern. I see a lot of deep breaths when they are signing those papers.
TLW, when someone asks me how things or business is going, my response is always "Great", no matter how bad my day is going, things are "Great". Then I come on here on vent out.
And TLW, for you this is your best behavior. Somebody has to lighten things up.
Good post...keep them coming!
The Process of buying a home is not just stressful, it is very emotional. Some have said that the only transaction in life that is more emotional than buying a home is adopting a child.
Anytime emotions are part of the equation, there will be stress. It is almost as if stress is a by-product of emotion. A valuable asset for any agent is a strong ability to listen with empathy, that is with a sense for what the client is feeling. If you can communicate with them in a way that has them see that you are on their side, understand their position, and are willing to face the issue together, it lessens the stress that often wells up from their sense of being alone and overwhelmed by the complexities of real estate transactions.
(Don't appologize for "preaching to the choir." By helping others in the business succeed, through words of advice, helpful posts, etc., we help improve the overall quality of the profession, which helps us all. Your words are always appreciated.)
Excellent comment Rich. I wish I had included the emotional component in the blog, but now I don't have to because you have stated it better than I ever could, thank you.
I have had the stress poured out on me with the yelling. Believe it or not I let them get it out and I mean get it out until their is slienced for around 10 seconds, because if there is not silence for a good long period of time they are not done and then very quitely I move on with the process and they have gotten it out of their system and later they appolize. Then I feel good again.
I haven't heard of anyone doing that, Susan. Interesting way of handling it.
I'm with you, Susan. In these transactions, very often we are the ONLY ones our clients can vent to...their parents don't know as much as we do about their finances, spouses are tired of hearing it, and sometimes just letting it out solves whatever crisis cropped up.
An uneasy buyer and an uneducated agent is the root of stressfull homebuying. Don't be either one and you will be just fine...lol
Thank you Jennifer, I do my best to not contribute to stress and hopefully help to reduce it.
Why let the minor stress bother you? Deal with it, that's why we make the big $$$. Hehe JJ!!!