Scott Leaf Real Estate Marketing & Associates

SOCIALISM
You have 2 cows.
You give one to your neighbour.

COMMUNISM
You have 2 cows.
The State takes both and gives you some milk.

FASCISM
You have 2 cows.
The State shoots you, takes both and sells you some milk.

NAZISM
You have 2 cows.
The State takes both and shoots you.

BUREAUCRATISM
You have 2 cows.
The State takes both, shoots one, milks the other, and then throws the milk away...

TRADITIONAL CAPITALISM
You have two cows.
You sell one and buy a bull.
Your herd multiplies, and the economy grows.
You sell them and retire on the income.

SURREALISM
You have two giraffes.
The government requires you to take harmonica lessons

SCIENTOLOGY CORPORATION
You have cows, the number doesnt matter, the world is coming to an end and only Hollywood Celebrities can save it, so you give your cows and everthing else you own to the corporation run by a guy who has been dead for years to take a never ending series of Dianetics Courses.

AN AMERICAN CORPORATION
You have two cows.
You sell one, and force the other to produce the milk of four cows.
Later, you hire a consultant to analyse why the cow has dropped dead.

ENRON VENTURE CAPITALISM
You have two cows.
You sell three of them to your publicly listed company, using letters of credit opened by your brother-in-law at the bank, then execute a debt/equity swap with an associated general offer so that you get all four cows back, with a tax exemption for five cows.
The milk rights of the six cows are transferred via an intermediary to a Cayman Island Company secretly owned by the majority shareholder who sells the rights to all seven cows back to your listed company.
The annual report says the company owns eight cows, with an option on one more.
You sell one cow to buy a new president of the United States , leaving you with nine cows.
No balance sheet provided with the release.
The public then buys your bull.

A FRENCH CORPORATION
You have two cows.
You go on strike, organise a riot, and block the roads, because you want three cows.

A JAPANESE CORPORATION
You have two cows.
You redesign them so they are one-tenth the size of an ordinary cow and produce twenty times the milk.
You then create a clever cow cartoon image called 'Cowkimon' and market it worldwide.

A GERMAN CORPORATION
You have two cows.
You re-engineer them so they live for 100 years, eat once a month, and milk themselves.

AN ITALIAN CORPORATION
You have two cows, but you don't know where they are.
You decide to have lunch.

A RUSSIAN CORPORATION
You have two cows.
You count them and learn you have five cows.
You count them again and learn you have 42 cows.
You count them again and learn you have 2 cows.
You stop counting cows and open another bottle of vodka.

A SWISS CORPORATION
You have 5000 cows. None of them belong to you.
You charge the owners for storing them.

A CHINESE CORPORATION
You have two cows.
You have 300 people milking them.
You claim that you have full employment, and high bovine productivity.
You arrest the newsman who reported the real situation.

AN INDIAN CORPORATION
You have two cows.
You worship them.

A BRITISH CORPORATION
You have two cows.
Both are mad.

AN IRAQI CORPORATION
Everyone thinks you have lots of cows.
You tell them that you have none.
No-one believes you, so they bomb the **** out of you and invade your country.
You still have no cows, but at least now you are part of " Democracy.... "

AN AUSTRALIAN CORPORATION
You have two cows.
Business seems pretty good.
You close the office and go for a few beers to celebrate.

A NEW ZEALAND CORPORATION
You have two cows.
The one on the left looks very attractive.

Scott Leaf Real Estate Marketing & Associates

Keller Williams Results Realty

www.whatismyhomesvalue.ca

www.scottleaf.com

This story is all over the Blogosphere and appears to have legs.

Hey John McCain you've just lost the United States Presidential election, what are you going to do now?

"Im going to Divorce Court!"

Well probably not considering Cindy McCain is the Chairman of the board of the company that distributes Amheuser Busch among others and is worth personally worth over 100 million dollars.

The amazing part of this stroy that makes me consider if it is a hoax is the claims that this affair started in 2006 and has been displayed brazingly in public at such places as a Moody Blues concert and all during the most covered Presidential Election in the history of the world!

Is the Chairman of Hensley & Co stupid enough to shag some washed up car salesmen in public while her husband runs for President? Suspicious but all the Kennedy's did it back as far as we know right to old man Joe. Heck Joe's mistress ate dinner with the family.

The lifestyles of the rich and famous certainly are 'From a Different World' aren't they?

Scott Leaf Real Estate Marketing & Associates

Keller Williams Results Realty

www.whatismyhomesvalue.ca

www.scottleaf.com

Smart!Centres, the mall development company which owns 35 acres in Albion flats, north of Lougheed Highway and west of 105th Avenue, has taken out an ad and put up a sign asking: "Want a new shopping centre in Maple Ridge?"

And if that's not enough, a website gives a look at what might be in store by referring to its latest project, Grandview Corners Shopping District in south Surrey, the site of Wal-Mart's Supercentre.

The company wants to hear from the public what kind of stores it would like to see in Maple Ridge, said Sandra Kaiser, vice-president of corporate affairs.

"We just want to get some feedback," said from her Toronto-area office.

The company's website also includes letters to the district from 2006 and 2007, expressing interest in the Albion flats.

The letters, from 11 companies - including Home Depot, Future Shop and The Brick - all cite the recent completion of the official community plan and express interest in the Albion area.

It's been four years since the company first tried to get land it owned in the area excluded from the Agricultural Land Reserve. Council, in 2004, refused to forward the application to the land commission.

This topic has attracted more attention on my Blog then any other this year, it seems that people are concerned about shopping in Albion far more then they are about preserving the Jackson property on 102ave and Jackson st. I have even had potential leasees call me mistakenly to enquire as to a waiting list for occupancy!

The new Maple Ridge Council better take this question seriously or risk their own peril!

Scott Leaf Real Estate Marketing & Associates

Keller Williams Results Realty

www.whatismyhomesvalue.ca

www.scottleaf.com

Maple Ridge Mayor incumbent Gordon Robson was soundly beaten yesterday finishing a distant 3rd behind winner Councillor Ernie Daykin and the second place finisher NDP MLA Michael Sather.

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Why did Robson lose? Was it because people were disatisfied with his performance or was it that Daykin was just much more popular? I was not a fan of Robson as Mayor, and trully questioned his personal motives for being Mayor and his accomplishments as Mayor but I ask myself this question, is Daykin going to do a better job?

Daykin and several Councillors have already shown that they potentially are about to make a terrible decision and reward a campaign contribution as in the case of the proposed land swap of urban reserve included Jackson Farm for a none Urban Reserve Farm on 248th street and greatly increased density. This narrow sighted hodge podge zoning proposal completely disregards the Official Community Plan and sets a dangerous precedent of skipping the exisiting plan to develop the urban areas in a logical order as required and as services are able to be provided.

The Albion urban real estate area isnt even half built upon yet and already a landowner has found a way to subvert the process and get a foot in the door to expand the urban boundary. The owners of the 248th property will make more money with 6000 sq ft lots at 248th then they ever would have with the Jackson property due to the terrain and necssary park dedications that they would have had to endure causing them to lose about half the property.

I predicted early on, that Ernie Daykin would win due to his well known name recognition factor and the fact that he has politically never done anything to tick off a large number of voters as did Robson. Now its time to do something, lets see if his first major act as Mayor is to support a major blunder of swapping a pretend farm in the urban reserve for a real one outside of it.

Back to Gordy, I cant recall an instance of Robson being accused of giving a major campaign contributer a reward such as this as Daykin is proposing to give to the owners of the 248th st and Jackson properties.

Scott Leaf Real Estate Marketing & Associates

Keller Williams Results Realty

www.whatismyhomesvalue.ca

www.scottleaf.com

Dateline Albion, November 15, 2008.

Your intrepid reporter Scott Leaf, has just learned that the long awaited Albion Pizzeria located in the burgeoning Albion real estate area of Mape Ridge is just days away from opening!

Partners Rodney Lund & Martin Petersten have braved landlords leases, city inspectors and delinquent trades in order to bring Pizza to the people of Albion. This much awaited enterprise has been the buzz of the Albion elementary school with respect to the 'When is it opening?' question.

Albion Pizzeria will offer take out and delivery to the Cottonwood, Albion and Whonnock areas of Maple Ridge, so watch out for the 'Open' sign to be illuminated mid next week for an un-advertised soft opening.

Rumours abound of a conspiracy of friends to strategicly order delivery from opposite ends of the service area to give Rodney & Martin a very intense welcome to Business first week!

Good luck guys, I know it will be a huge success, and remember we dont want to see Gordon Ramsey of Kitchen Nightmares down there anytime soon!

Scott Leaf Real Estate Marketing & Associates

Keller Williams Results Realty

604-839-8239

www.whatismyhomesvalue.ca